talend does not work

by Jannik Arndt

I cannot believe that googleing “talend does not work” does not find anything helpful. With this entry I try to fill that void in the internet.

Fail 1: Download

You can download talend on their website — except you can’t. After filling out all the information (pro-tip: store them in LastPass to insert them the next couple of times) you have to accept the terms of use—except you can’t!

There is no event listener. What the…?

There’s a trick: Select the “Phone”-field and alt + tab until you arrive at the checkbox, then hit space.

Next: Enjoy your modern webbrowser prohibiting a site to cross-reference http from https

But there is a download-link hidden inside the plethora of error messages:

If you’re looking for these, here you go:


They won’t help you, because they might be offline. If not, you get one of the greatest tools of all times—not.

Fail 2: The Download-Tool

Pretty simple: You start it, it does nothing:

Reminds me of “A Sharepoint that does throw errors is a good Sharepoint”.

Fail 3: The ZIP-File

Okay, while you wait for the download tool to do anything, you can also try out the ZIP-download-option. This link surprisingly worked! And it contains a Talend-Studio-macosx-cocoa.app file!

An unsigned one, of course, because why make things easy? The common advise you find on the internet is to turn off Gatekeeper, Apples system tool to prevent you from running malicious code (i.e. from developers who do not pay apple 100$/year). The easy way to get around this is to right-click a file and then click open. One would suspect this to do the exact same thing as double clicking the file, but watch and learn: It gives you an extra button:

And the next thing you see is: “The Talend-Studio-macosx-cocoa executable launcher was unable to locate its companion share library”.


This is a hard one: You need to right-click the app, choose Show package contents, navigate to Contents:MacOS:Talend-Studio-macosx-cocoa and execute that. Voilà! It starts!


Storing case classes in a MongoDB database is incredibly easy, once you know how. The same goes for java.time classes such as ZonedDateTime, LocalDate or Duration.

This example uses the official Mongo Scala Driver in version 2.x and the bsoncodec project by Ralph Schaer.

This post contains the absolut essence from the Terraform Getting Started Guide: https://www.terraform.io/intro/getting-started/install.html

Ever wondered where bad code comes from?

“This story is done”

“Shouldn’t someone review it first?”

“Oh, yeah … erm … I’ll do a quick refactoring first and then…”

…when that other person is on holiday!

Some ideas seem great at first but turn out to be incredibly bad in hindsight. I reviewed such an idea today.

I tried to create a single image that contains all the most important git commands:

The Problem

You’re a corporation. Your IT department is old, slow and can’t innovate. Your competitor however can. So you try what every corporation tries: Two-speed IT.

Last week one of our programs failed looking up an airplane by its registration. That’s not a surprise, since ac regs are a horrible identifier. They change all the time. Also there is almost no naming rule at all. Wikipedia states

When painted on the fuselage, the prefix and suffix are usually separated by a dash (for example, YR-BMA). When entered in a flight plan, the dash is omitted (for example, YRBMA). In some countries that use a number suffix rather than letters, like the United States (N), South Korea (HL), and Japan (JA), the prefix and suffix are connected without a dash.

My favourite animal: The Beluga!

TL;DR: You don’t. We eventually gave up on it.

My personal lessons-learned:

  • Pentaho Kettle (or “Community Edition”, CE, i.e. the open-source core) is a great product for one-time data transfer or on-demand data transfer, but not for resilient, scheduled jobs.
  • The “Enterprise Edition” (EE) adds scheduling that doesn’t work reliably, and a very powerless server.
  • Kerberos is a bitch.


You have a denormalized table and want to extract a column into a dimension table.


You have to keep the ids.


You use an Oracle database.

I cannot believe that googleing “talend does not work” does not find anything helpful. With this entry I try to fill that void in the internet.


Do not fix your code.

Rather understand why nothing kept you from creating this bug. Make your code so easy that this bug would have been obvious the first time.

Being the IT-guy aka personal first-level-support™ for way more people than I am comfortable with, I have held quite a few mobile phones in my hand and stared into the abyss that is their home screen. The home screen is the modern view into someone’s soul. In a post-privacy-world it is probably one of the most private things we have, since it is utterly worthless to someone who does not interact with it on an hourly basis and has grown to live with whatever way the apps are scattered around the screen.

(via I Love Programming)

Thank goodness, we don’t do production.

Since I bought my personal domain name around 2003, I went through several web-solutions, using static html pages, php pages, a custom designed php cms, finally Wordpress and now, as of yesterday, I am back to static html. The 2016-flavour however, which is another attempt of separation of presentation and content (a concept I highly endorse as a LaTeX user).